[audio:https://schizophreniapoetry.com/file/2012/04/A-Spirit-Made-Me-Sick.mp3|titles=A Spirit Made Me Sick]
A SPIRIT MADE ME SICK…
I was quite okay until I came to learn
that bad things
could happen in life.
I was eleven and Dad was leaving….
For good this time.
I even dreamt it before it happened.
And I am still the prophet I was,
except that I refuse to believe now,
for I am told
that everything I see
is just a mild delusion
and still to this day
Nobody understands what happened
in my room that night.
The darkness bringing shadows to life
razor sharp and hungry for a laugh.
The room grows cold as the stench comes like
an intruder from underneath my door
I remain like a stone beneath my blanket
But it knows I’m there
and penetrates the covers
seeping in through my skin and ears
I tremble with the darkest fear of God
Because these prayers are not working
I close my eyes and watch the breath leave my body
Inducing myself, back
into the foggy perimeters of dream.
A final defense
And the shadows are not laughing
But everyone else will…
In the school hall, they will be whispering about you;
chuckling as you pass
Stripping you naked
with mocking eyes
and dirty fingernails
In the workplace…
They will complain about you on their breaks
Until you sit down
And the humiliating silence catches up with you
Lovers will use it against you
Leaving windows open in the winter
As a feigned offering of compassion,
to appease the wrath of your embarrassing impotence
friends will dissipate
family will stop answering your calls
Everyone will abandon you because of me
But they will never forget us…
And so try to remember my child
that this is all just a mild
just take your medication…
and it all goes away.
Shayne Labrooy (c)